First of all, none of the things you'll find in this section are Quake-related. Second of all, I didn't write any of them, so I'm not taking credit for them.

BUT, I do think that these are some of the funniest things on the 'net. They're basically text files that get posted to newsgroups, or show up in my e-mail, or I find them somewhere else. Only the best of the best goes up here. Some (most) of these are kind of nasty, so you've been warned. Enjoy!

Cement Cuddlers
Having Fun with a Poor Newbie who Thinks he's Being Hacked
How to Write Good
LAN People
What Gender is your Computer?
Professor's Revenge
How to keep a Healthy Level of Sanity (and Drive Other People Insane)
Law as it Should Be
Reservations of an Airline Agent
The Saga of Frank The Inexperienced Chili Taster
Tandem Story
Bricklayer's Accident Report
Cat in the Garbage Disposal
Mistaken Rapture
Cigar Insurance
Visions of the Star Trek Future
Cat Toys
Barometer Physics
25 Ways to Confuse your Professors
How to be a Superhero
Diary of an AOL User
Life in Prison -vs- A Full-Time Job
Movie Rules
What Goes Around...
Nuclear Picnic
Horror Movie Survival Guide
How Can I Keep my Work from being Stolen?
The Dark Sucker Theory
The Real 12 Days of Christmas
Guide to Chain Letters
Golf Course Rules
Santa Physics
Proper Care of Floppy Disks
Hotel Soap
100 Zany Ways to Phone in a Pizza Order
Internet Emoticons and their Meanings
Excerpts from a Canadian Diary
The Schitt Family
The $0.00 Bill
50 Fun Things to do in a Final Exam
20 Ways to Annoy a Public Bathroom Stallmate
The Great Cat/Toast Debate - Resolved
Survival Guide for Taking a Dump at Work
A Dog named "Sex"
Instructions for Giving your Cat a Pill
Surrogate Photographer
Real Life Cybersex
The Steakhouse Incident